BUTS...

Maybe Brett will take his $20 million and go away so I can get him off my TV screen. Here's some things to help divert your attention away from the land-o-cheddar.

FRIDAY, AUGUST 1

Basketball

Men's national teams, USA vs. Lithuania, at Macau, ESPN2, 8 a.m.

I don't have my globe handy...can someone tell me where the H*LL "Macau" is????

Boxing

Super middleweights, Jean Pascal vs. Fulgencio Zuniga, at Montreal, ESPN2, 9 p.m.

Junior middleweights, Pawel Wolak vs. Ishe Smith; lightweights, Jorge Teron vs. Michael Lozada, at New York, Showtime, 11 p.m. (same-day tape on West Coast)

Extreme sports

X Games, at Los Angeles, ESPN, 9 p.m.

These guys are a little off!

Golf

Ricoh Women's British Open Championship, second round, at Berkshire, England, TNT, 10 a.m.

Nationwide Tour, Cox Classic, second round, at Omaha, Golf Channel, noon

U.S. Senior Open Championship, second round, at Colorado Springs, ESPN, 1 p.m.

PGA Tour/WGC, Bridgestone Invitational, second round, at Akron, Ohio, Golf Channel, 2 p.m.

PGA Tour, Legends Reno-Tahoe Open, second round, at Reno, Golf Channel, 6:30 p.m.

Motor sports

FIA Formula One World Championship, Hungarian Grand Prix, practice, at Budapest, Speed, 8 a.m.

NASCAR Sprint Cup, Sunoco Red Cross Pennsylvania 500, at Long Pond, Pa., practice, Speed, noon; pole qualifying, ESPN2, 3:30 p.m.

NASCAR Nationwide Series, NAPA Auto Parts 200, practice, at Montreal, ESPN2, 2 p.m.

Grand-Am Rolex Sports Car Series, at Montreal, Speed, 8 p.m. (same-day tape)

Tennis

ATP Tour Masters Series, Western & Southern Financial Group Masters, quarterfinals, at Cincinnati, ESPN2, noon and 7 p.m.

Sony Ericsson WTA Tour, Rogers Cup, quarterfinal, at Montreal, ESPN2, 11 p.m. (same-day tape)

SATURDAY, AUGUST 2

Basketball

Men's national teams, USA vs. Russia, at Shanghai, ESPN2, 3 a.m.

Logistical question...USA V. Russia at Shanghai...Who's wearing the Road uni's? This is the stuff I think about.

Boxing

Champion Dimitri Kirilov vs. Vic Darchinyan, for IBF junior bantamweight title; super middleweights, Andre Dirrell vs. Mike Paschall, at Tacoma, Wash., Showtime, 9 p.m. (same-day tape on West Coast)

Zab Judah vs. Joshua Clottey, for vacant IBF welterweight title, at Las Vegas, HBO, 9:30 p.m. (same-day tape on West Coast)

Extreme sports

X Games, ABC, 3 p.m.; ESPN2, 7 p.m.; ESPN, 9 p.m.

That was worse than some of that "Faces of Death" Sh*T!

Golf

PGA Tour/WGC, Bridgestone Invitational, third round, CBS, 1 p.m.

Ricoh Women's British Open Championship, third round, ABC, 1:30 p.m. (same-day tape)

True or False...There is a woman in this picture? I'm relentless...I know!

U.S. Senior Open Championship, third round, NBC, 3 p.m.

Nationwide Tour, Cox Classic, third round, Golf Channel, 3 p.m.

PGA Tour, Legends Reno-Tahoe Open, third round, Golf Channel, 6:30 p.m.

Horse racing

The Hambletonian, at East Rutherford, N.J., NBC, 2 p.m.

Test Stakes, at Saratoga Springs, N.Y. and West Virginia Derby, at Chester, W.Va., ESPN, 5 p.m.

Little League Baseball

Big League World Series, championship game, at Easley, S.C., ESPN, 2 p.m.

Major League Baseball

Regional coverage, Los Angeles Angels at New York Yankees, Milwaukee at Atlanta, or Chicago White Sox at Kansas City, Fox, 3:30 p.m.

Motor sports

FIA Formula One World Championship, Hungarian Grand Prix, pole qualifying, Speed, 8 a.m.

NASCAR Sprint Cup, Sunoco Red Cross Pennsylvania 500, practice, ESPN2, 10 a.m.

NASCAR Nationwide Series, NAPA Auto Parts 200, ESPN2, pole qualifying, 12:30 p.m.; race, 3:30 p.m.

AMA Superbike Championship, Honda Super Cycle Weekend, at Lexington, Ohio, Speed, 6 p.m. (same-day tape)

NFL

Pro Football Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony, at Canton, Ohio, ESPN, 6 p.m.

I don't care who's getting inducted as long as something on TV has the letters NFL in front of it!!!

Tennis

ATP Tour Masters Series, Western & Southern Financial Group Masters, semifinal, ESPN2, 9 p.m. (same-day tape)

Sony Ericsson WTA Tour, Rogers Cup, semifinals, ESPN2, 11 p.m. (same-day tape)


Sorry, I couldn't resist!


SUNDAY, AUGUST 3

Extreme sports

X Games, ABC, 3 p.m.

Golf

Ricoh Women's British Open Championship, final round, ABC, 1 p.m. (same-day tape)

PGA Tour/WGC, Bridgestone Invitational, final round, CBS, 1 p.m.

U.S. Senior Open Championship, final round, NBC, 3 p.m.

Nationwide Tour, Cox Classic, final round, Golf Channel, 3 p.m.

PGA Tour, Legends Reno-Tahoe Open, final round, Golf Channel, 6:30 p.m.

Major League Baseball

Los Angeles Angels at New York Yankees, TBS, 1 p.m.

Pittsburgh at Chicago Cubs, WGN, 2:10 p.m.

Philadelphia at St. Louis, ESPN, 8 p.m.

Mixed martial arts

World Extreme Cagefighting, 10 bouts, at Las Vegas, Versus, 9 p.m.

Motor sports

FIA Formula One World Championship, Hungarian Grand Prix, Speed, 7:30 a.m.

NASCAR Sprint Cup, Sunoco Red Cross Pennsylvania 500, ESPN, 2 p.m.

AMA Superbike Championship, Honda Super Cycle Weekend, at Lexington, Ohio, Speed, 5 p.m. (same-day tape)

NFL

Washington vs. Indianapolis, preseason, at Canton, Ohio, NBC, 8 p.m.
MANNA FROM HEAVEN...even if it is third stringers!

Tennis

ATP Tour Masters Series, Western & Southern Financial Group Masters, championship match, ESPN2, 3 p.m.

Sony Ericsson WTA Tour, Rogers Cup, championship match, ESPN2, 5 p.m.

Have a great weekend...FOOTBALL IS HERE!!!!

-Coop